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Predators fan hates Shea Weber, writes gloriously vulgar country song


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by Travis Hughes

Ever since the Nashville Predators matched Shea Weber's 14-year, $110 million offer sheet from thePhiladelphia Flyers, the defenseman has said all the right things: He's always loved Nashville, is happy and excited to play the rest of his career there, etc.

That's likely true: Sure, he clearly had a desire to play in Philly, as evidenced by the fact that he accepted the Flyers massive offer sheet, but by doing so he directly put the ball in Nashville's court. Whether or not he thought the Predators were going to match or not, the chance was always there. You don't just risk the chance of being tied down somewhere for 14 years if you truly never want to play there again.

Don't tell that to one Predators fan, though. His name is Curly Clump and he likely hates Shea Weber more than anybody on this planet. Curly wrote a song about Shea -- it's called "Hey, Ol' Shea" -- and it's just ... wow. By no means is it appropriate or endorsable or safe for work, but we just can't help but pass it along to you.

It's too ... too .... well, see for yourself if you dare:

SERIOUSLY: THIS IS YOUR WARNING. Clicking play will open you to a whole new world of vulgarity.

Of course, we couldn't help but transcribe the lyrics:

Hey, ol' Shea

What else can a Tennessean say?

You's thought you was all gone away

But now you's here to stay

Well, skies are always sunny

When you're makin' lots of money

Bangin' bushels of Southern honey's

The little plump ones bounce like bunnies

Hey, ol' Shea

What else can a Tennessean say?

Neither General Grant

Nor a turncoat in gray

Could ever piss me off in such a way

You 6'4 stack of steamin' ****

If you don't like it here then *****' quit

My oldest sister's got two fat crooked ****

I know you'll like the taste when they're dipped in grits

You selfish *****

You greedy ****

Suter blew

But you suck!

Hey, ol' Shea

What else can a Tennessean say?

Do you really think we oughta pay

For your money grubbin' ******* ways?

If I was in ol' Davey's shoes

I'd pawn your ass off to those Ohio Blues

Give ya 13 years of bad, bad news

But you'll be rich!

Who cares if they always lose?

Hey, ol' Shea

What else can a Tennessean say?

Well I'm not sure if you're straight or gay

But Music City's ass is bleedin' everyday

We're givin' you most of our hard earned cash

Won't be no surprise if the banks all crash

People down here don't mind a little trash

But all your ******** has got us sour mashed

You selfish *****

You greedy ****

Lincoln blew

But you suck!

Hey, ol' Shea

What else can a Tennessean say?

I've got a mule with more integrity

And a sheep who shows more love for me

Well you're good at slammin' heads into the glass

Yeah, we already knew you got no class

We eat craw dads, catfish, crappie bass

So take your caviar and stick it up your fancy ass

Hey, ol' Shea

What else can a Tennessean say?

Your little mouth is cute and purty

And your beard would make my **** think it's a *****

Some of the lines in there definitely made me fidget uncomfortably in my chair a little bit, and it all seems like a ton of misdirected anger at a guy who is clearly (in my opinion, at least) happy to be in Nashville, playing for the Preds.

But I have to say, I'm impressed with the deep knowledge of the situation: He knows that Weber can't get traded for a year -- thus the 13 year remark -- and a good Blue Jackets joke is always okay.

h/t Backhand Shelf

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Can you imagine if they dealt him to Columbus and said "That's what ya get for being a turncoat"? LOL Dear Lord that would be hysterical to me. Anyway, Weber is trying to win his fans back.. guess we'll see how that goes.

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